Sunday, April 25, 2010

{detox}

I am in need of it in a bad way. I think this is the beginning of a series for me. At least to get me through this week. Also, I want the boys to someday look back and realize my struggle has had absolutely nothing to do with them, but solely me and my insecurities.
In the midst of a I can,I can't, I can, I can't moment today I was texting with a dear friend who was as always, encouraging me all the way. Even getting together a "get it together" {my description, not hers...although....she was probably...thinking} lunch on Tuesday before my big day on Wednesday. In my moment of panic, I heard this.
It spoke very clearly to me. So, I cried. Which I seem to be doing a lot of these days. And, I know to so many they probably want to smack me upside the head. But, I'll be back to fill you in on why this is such an upheaval for me. I am so very thankful for the changes that are about to come. But, am fighting fear and a personality that runs deep in a big way.
Also, note to self: I will not be cutting the giving to Air 1 from our budget. That is where I heard "my word" today. It was just for me. But, if it was just for me....how could there not be more? So, I'll be cutting my iced coffees and frappes if need be.
Everything is being put back in perspective in a huge way.

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