Sunday, September 27, 2009


i jotted this on FB today, but, wanted to add it here as well....

today, i stood at the opened front door and watched evan - clad in underwear only as always, chasing his puppy molly as she chased a yellow butterfly. i'm kinda thinking they were all giggling.

and, the boy gave out first. ;) although i had time to grab my camera and snap - i didn't. i absolutely could not pull myself away from soaking it all in.


Since Wednesday night, when the circumstances changed so quickly with sweet Wyatt, I have been in utter shock. I am numb. My heart is broken. And, I do not know what to do for my precious friend except pray. And, praying I have been.

I'm not sure how much sleep I will get tonight because of the dread of tomorrow. I can't even imagine how Jessica and Ryan are tonight. At all. I feel like such a coward because I want to avoid seeing the pain in their eyes tomorrow. This is one of the absolute worst feelings in the world...I feel so helpless.

And, if sleep does not come easily tonight...I will just keep praying. They are going to need so much of it tomorrow and in all the days to come.

"And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." Phillipians 4:7 NIV

Thursday, September 24, 2009


another devotional. i am definitely searching right now...and, this one hit me between the eyes.

Through Faith

"Pressed out of measure" (2 Cor. 1:8).

"That the power of Christ may rest upon me" (2 Cor. 12:9).

God allowed the crisis to close around Jacob on the night when he bowed at Peniel in supplication, to bring him to the place where he could take hold of God as he never would have done; and from that narrow pass of peril, Jacob became enlarged in his faith and knowledge of God, and in the power of a new and victorious life.

God had to compel David, by a long and painful discipline of years, to learn the almighty power and faithfulness of his God, and grow up into the established principles of faith and godliness, which were indispensable for his glorious career as the king of Israel.

Nothing but the extremities in which Paul was constantly placed could ever have taught him, and taught the Church through him, the full meaning of the great promise he so learned to claim, "My grace is sufficient for thee."

And nothing but our trials and perils would ever have led some of us to know Him as we do, to trust Him as we have, and to draw from Him the measures of grace which our very extremities made indispensable.

Difficulties and obstacles are God's challenges to faith. When hindrances confront us in the path of duty, we are to recognize them as vessels for faith to fill with the fullness and all-sufficiency of Jesus; and as we go forward, simply and fully trusting Him, we may be tested, we may have to wait and let patience have her perfect work; but we shall surely find at last the stone rolled away, and the Lord waiting to render unto us double for our time of testing. --A. B. Simpson

i have often half-heartedly joked about the clouds that seem to linger over our household, to the point that it has actually been embarrassing, as crazy as that sounds. as i struggle with what others that i love so much are going through.....i know that without so many of the storms that i have been in the midst of.....i would not be where i am now, be who i am now or know what i know now. it's much easier to look back and see it when the storm has died down because you can see anything at all when the rain is blinding.

i will praise you in the storm is sometimes easier said that done, but, if we can get there...the peace definitely overtakes that storm.

{talking to self}

i have greatly challenged over the past week. and, at times, i will admit, i've been at a total loss as to what to do or say. so, i've pretty much decided to be still. i think that "being still" often keeps me from crashing in a big way.

with everything that is swirling around me, i could allow myself to feel pretty hopeless. helpless is one thing, but, hopeless is an entirely different monster. i am desperately praying for guidance regarding difficult situations. i do not want to be someone that hinders, or hurts or causes someone to stumble. i want to approach each of these situations as He would. but, my heart is hurt. i don't understand the why? in the situations. so, i'm being still. and, praying alot.

i've read today's devotional no less than four times. i think it is worthy to be shared.

Girlfriends in God - Sept. 24, 2009

September 24, 2009
Fact or Fiction?
Gwen Smith

Today's Truth
"But in your hearts set apart Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. (1 Peter 3:15, NIV)

Friend to Friend
There is a tale told of that great English actor Macready. An eminent preacher once said to him: "I wish you would explain to me something."

"Well, what is it? I don't know that I can explain anything to a preacher."

"What is the reason for the difference between you and me?" The preacher asked. "You are appearing before crowds night after night with fiction, and the crowds come wherever you go. I am preaching the essential and unchangeable truth, and I am not getting any crowd at all."

Macready's answer was this: "This is quite simple. I can tell you the difference between us. I present my fiction as though it were truth; you present your truth as though it were fiction."

Zinger, huh? Sure does challenge my faith-o-meter. This story both motivates and cautions me. Frankly, Christians embarrass the cause of Christ all the time. It's vital that we be confident in the message of hope we cling to as believers in Jesus, but it's equally vital that we be prepared to share truth in love - share Scripture in proper context - share our hears with meekness and fear for the purpose of attracting others to the restoring love of Christ. We don't need to be Bible scholars with capital letters following our names...but we do need to be Bible girls!

I don't need to harp on the fact that there's a great moral decline in the world. We see that coming and going! As Girlfriends In God (GiGs), let's commit ourselves to making a difference in the lives of others, in our homes, among our friends, in our communities, and in this world! To do this, we need to know our Bibles. To think through current issues. We must be prepared to share how we've been changed by the love of God through His Son, Jesus Christ. It's the great commission, and it's for each of us...not for the perfect among us. People around us need to know that God is still in the restoration business - and that He longs to bring His peace, hope and love to every life.

Look at the apostle Paul. He was prepared to speak about Christ wherever he went. In the New Testament book of Acts, we learn that, "from morning 'til evening he explained and declared to them the kingdom of God and tried to convince them about Jesus from the Law of Moses and from the Prophets." (Acts 28:23b, NIV)

The life-changing, peace-giving, truth we know needs to be presented to the world as life-changing, peace-giving truth! Get in His Word - get in His presence - and look for opportunities to share God's love as truth with confidence!

Let's Pray
Dear Lord, Please forgive me for the times when I doubt your truth, or fear speaking it. Help me to always be prepared to give an answer for the hope I speak of Your unfailing love and unchanging truth to those around me so that they might be drawn to Your heart. Draw me to Your Word and teach me Your ways.

In Jesus Name,

Now It's Your Turn
Read 2 Timothy 1:12: "Yet I am not ashamed, because I know whom I have believed..." Can you say that and mean that?

Are you prepared to give an answer for the hope you have?

Have you been changed by God's grace? Held by His love? Grab your journal and write a paragraph or two that describes how God has worked in your life.


although my heart has been greatly challenged with loss and pain and fear over the past week, my hope remains. my hope remains that God will replace the void and loss so many hearts are feeling with His love. replace the fear of tomorrow with His perfect peace. replace the sadness and grief with joy.

i have to hold onto this hope, because what does the alternative offer? and, my heart knows this hope remains true.

{thank you}

i know that most of you did not know sweet jessica and ryan. and, i never got to meet our precious wyatt sutton. but, i did want to thank so many of you, that despite not having a personal connection with them - you took the time out of your days to pray for them and ask for updates as throughout this past month. so many of you immediately stopped and prayed for them went i sent out that plea last night. some of you received my calls requesting prayer, however, before i made it through the remainder of my wyatt flew away to be with jesus.

my heart is in absolute crumbles. but, i wanted to tell you - that after he was gone last night....sweet jessica once again voiced their sincere appreciation for all of the prayers.

let's just not stop. they will need it now more than ever.

{heavy heart}

i have been absent from here i know, juggling a few more balls than usual.

i have alot to fill you in on, but, my brain can't even pull itself together enough to do that. my heart is incrediably heavy.

i have several friends who are traveling through the darkest days of their lives right now; i feel so helpless. and, that is an agonizing pain in and of itself. what words or actions can i do to comfort? to encourage? to help? to love them?

we were never promised a life without obstacles. we were never promised a life without pain. and, if we aren't there today, we know it lies in wait in the road ahead of us.

but, thankfully we do have God's grace. and love. and mercy. and arms. right now, those arms are wrapped around many.

but, on a brighter day, i will return and post updates on the boys, how they make me smile, how i'm beginning to treasure things i have not in a long while, how perspectives have been changed, how i am being stretched - and, i will give you some giggles. i may not tell you about running over our dog. not the puppy but, ponner, the one with 21 lives. and, i won't tell you i did it one my bike and that he limped away in better shape than i did. i may give wise advice that it's not good for a blind dog to go running/biking with you.

Friday, September 11, 2009

{fall is in the air}

or, at least i'm ready for it to be. i've had a rush of work lately, so, nothing fun is getting done and it's KILLING me!

so, for now, i will not think about mums, pumpkins, finishing the patio {will it EVER end?}, the boxes in the attic and....get back to work. but, i'll light a candle first! :)

a marathon weekend is about to begin!

ps...okay, most of you know that i am "preschooling" evan at home this year. for no other reason than the schedule, driving times, etc. but, i will say......that i am LOVING it! we have had a loose schedule up until this point - meaning, he has done alot of workbook pages, writing, etc. but, now, we are actually "schooling" and today was apple day - so a sweet apple craft, caramel covered apples with sprinkles (of course) for both boys, A writing, etc. and, even better, HE loves it!

{poor girl}

last night i caught evan and molly doing the "cha-cha" in the kitchen. i hope she survives living with one of her boys. :) but, they both seemed to be smiling...

Tuesday, September 8, 2009

{big thank you!}

in no particular order....:)

but, tonight i heard a faint knocking at the door. it was our wonderful vet Dr. Nick :) who made a house call because I saw two fleas on sweet little molly. and, although i was unaware of the absurd reproduction rate of fleas (scary!) i knew, they were two fleas too many for my creepy crawly skin. i am speechless that he would do that, but, again, knowing he (and, his sweet wife....not really) but, I cannot thank you enough. not only have you saved the life of our very geriatric dog that continues to hang on by a toenail....oh, no, i think he probably lost those too, but, you saved my life before scott killed me if our house got fleas. truly, thank you from the bottom of our hearts!!!!!!

and, to mr. john although you do not likely know this blog exists...but, for all the work you have done for us this summer. the patio is hours away from completion and we could have never done it without your help, not even mentioning the long list of other things you have done for us. another, deep-hearted thank you!

both of you are such Godly, giving men (as well as your families)and it does not go unnoticed. we appreciate you more than words can say. both of you may need to stop answering your phone! :)

{my cutie-patootie FIVE year old}

i am still not certain how that happened? five years, seriously? i think something went off in the entire calculation of time. pretty certain of it.

and, yes, these are late. but, i am pretty much late on everything......of late. :) but, this was a super-fast 10-15 minute session. primarily, because of the hefty rates he charges me.

love him! the little man has definitely added a lot of "spice" to our life over the past five years.

now to start my day. i have a long-list of phone calls, emails and texts to respond to this morning and throughout the day. if you are one of them, "you know who you are." :) i had promised the boys, with the exceptions of "emergencies" I would not be on my blackberry this weekend. so, i wasn't. as hard as that was for me, it was really good for them.

{great weekend}

now it's back to reality! :)

we spent a great whirlwind trip (i am beginning to think i live in a whirlwind?) to oklahoma city for a very, very overdue trip to visit my family. it was way too short, but, absolutely great. the kids had a wonderful time. it just wasn't long enough. we laughed so much, ate way too much and stayed up late. it was great!

then, we made our trek back home only to catch a little sleep and immediately hit the road again. because, this or should i say "she" was calling our name....

this is our sweet molly. she is a king charles spaniel cavalier. i know, i've lost my mind. and, i do have to give big kudos to scott as this is something he caved on for the boys and i. but, she already has him wrapped. totally. they are super-affectionate and were used in the royal families for centuries as true lap dogs and they would also sit at the feet of the queen and keep her feet warm. since there are no queens in this house...i think i will settle to just get my hands on her when the other three aren't looking. she hasn't a chance. :)