{prayer request}

Tomorrow is a big, big day for us.

Something we have waited for only about 6+ years. 

We head to Houston with Scott to visit the post-traumatic brain

injury rehab hospital.  We will be meeting with the team on

Tuesday about 10 am. 

I am praying for God's will and if this is the place, then we

will know without any doubt.  If it is, we are planning on

going back for the hospitalization after the boys are out

of school this summer as they are anticipating a minimum of eight

weeks inpatient.  However, we have the option to begin it now and

that is not totally out of the question, but not very likely as we

could not stay with him at this point with school and the farm. 

So, we are asking for prayers of wisdom and safe travels!    

{the phone rang}

And, on the other end was Scott's nurse casemanager.

We are in the preliminary stages of possibly going to

a high-level traumatic brain injury clinic in Virginia for Scott. 

The physician at the Clinic just received our permission

to dive into the crazy amount of medical records.  

It looks like he and I may be flying out very soon.

I almost can't wrap my brain around what this could

mean and all that could change.  She is very hopeful.

And, so am I.  

I'm almost giddy and could cry at the same time.

Just keep us in your prayers!! 

{sigh}

I just peeked out the window again.

I had tears.

There is no doubt if Scott is having a chicken coop

like this built for me.......the man loves me. 

A. LOT.

The chickens.....well, he could care less.

But, he knows it's something the boys and I care about.

So, he cares about it. 

I am pretty much overwhelmed at this point.

And, very, very grateful.



{photography by noah b. walker}

I will be perfectly honest, I was holding on for dear life as I

was afraid I was going down that hill behind me. 

And, it hurt my back and neck.

But, after the terror & pain of the picture, I kind-of like it. :) 

Here is to our 22nd year together.

How in the world can that be? 

:)

{update}

Scott's BUN and creatinine levels {labs that measure kidney function} are still elevated. Waiting to find out what the next step will be. BUT, H&H are climbing again, so no transfusion! :)

{Yippppppppeeeeeeeeee!!!}

i am so stinkin' excited! and, i could use a little of that of late!

got my BIG early Christmas present. well, it's all i'll be getting from this point on but it had to be done or i couldn't be done.

i'm going to houston this spring to spend time with a photography genius! i could dance right now. {but, i'm waaayyyyy too tired!}

she's a rock star in the photography world. and, her style really speaks to me as i am not even close to her ability, but, our front-end style is similar if that makes any sense at all??

oh.my.goodness.

i cannot even believe it! woo-hoo!!!!!!!!!

and, she just emailed me!!!!! j

breathe.

on a bummer side.....my beloved lense that died. then, fired up again. died again. this time for good. new lense ordered. the upgraded version of course because nothing stays the same longer than 6 months in the photography equipment world. very bittersweet. but, that's okay, because i'll just take it to texas with me!!!

nite! edited until 2 this morning and if i don't make myself get away from here, i will not be sitting upright tomorrow. it takes a day to slam me.

rambling i know!

but.so.stinkin'.excited!!!!

{update}

after a very long wait in the waiting room {6+ hours} he finally made it back there. The IV with pain meds was started around 1 am. Because SEMMC could not access the CT Scan from Cooper - last night was determined to be a wash out except for the pain meds {which were much needed by that point} and of course, lab to see check in on infection. Bad news, since FS has only 2 Urologists and they service both hospitals, it will likely be a very long day of wait as well. Even more bad news, one of the stones is 1/3 larger than the size of a large cherry. {my estimate is so strange because I forgot what type of fruit Dr. W referenced and I am having to compare it to Scott's tumor}. Not good. I am hope scurrying to get the kids to school, his parents are with him. I am picking up my mom this morning and will simply prepare and deliver the food and head back to the hospital.

I may be calling on some of you to help with the boys after school {SO SORRY} and possibly collect my dishes/crock pot from Mrs. Ewing since they can't stay there until next week. {AGAIN, so sorry} otherwise, besides desperately wanting and needing to be in two places at once, I've got it covered.

THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU for all of your sweet texts last night!!! Will check back in as I can.

{oh dear}

dr. w is sending scott to the hospital.

hmmmm....i have a thanksgiving feast to cook for 18 little ones.

not going to panic.

dear God {and I mean that literally}

{medical report}

he has finally decided to have them either crushed or removed. we are suppose to see the urologist tomorrow. that is, if he makes it til tomorrow. :( this has been horrid.

{blissful thinking}

it's a constant struggle right now.

this time of year makes it that way for me.

i am literally "craving" domestic activities from decorating, to purging/organizing, cooking yummy comfort foods, reading multitudes of big books {as evan would say}, snuggling in winter pj's {even the ones that noah destests. the ones with the moose on them.}, listening to loads of christmas music, burning candles like there's no tomorrow, watching movies, folding warm laundry {yes, that is true!} but, typically i only want to do that for about a week or two. the laundry that is.

but, not yet as this computer is still beckoning me loudly.

i may, however, slip in a break or two this weekend.

happy weekend everyone!

ps...thanks for all the texts/emails/messages re: scott and evan. evan is doing well with no further complaints. fingers crossed there. poor scott...it is hard to watch this.....it is like the never-ending labor. i feel so bad for him!! he's being a trooper though. not sure we'll make it through this night without a trip to the er. my poor mom could not take it today and actually laid hands on him to pray. very sweet.

{wilted}

I think he felt sorry for me as I have wilted in a big way in this heat.

So, today, as we were out "buying" air.

Temporary air actually.

He bought me yellow roses.

Except........

they were white.

He had his glasses on of course.

{Happy Father's Day!}

Today is always such a bittersweet day for me....I miss my own Dad tremendously, but, am so thankful for Scott. We got him a couple of Good Life shirts with a promise to take him to a cool river to trout fish in the near future.


Last night we celebrated and he made it all about the boys....we ate at the "Watermelon" complete with a Mariachi band. I kid you not. Poor Scott - what are the odds?? He was in agony! Let's just say we ate realllllllllly fast. And, the reason we call it the watermelon restaurant is because it is painted a red/pink and green.....thus the name bestowed by my three boys.

Scott chose to go to the drive-in (temperature at 8:45 pm was 97 degrees) to see Marmaduke. What a great Dad! We love you dearly!! Thank you for loving us as well as you do!

Of course, all pics are in reverse order! :)

{Thank You!}

We are home, the boys are picked up and settled, and we're tired! ha!

But, the frantic pace of the day was so worth it as we got great news. That pesky tumor is still sitting there even though Scott kept telling Dr. Al Mefty that he knows it is going to disappear. He really does not know how to take Scott. Nor do any of the rest of us for that matter! JK, Honey! And, honestly, it can just continue to sit there...as it grew very little. We were very happy with the news.

Bad news: Dr. Al Mefty is leaving Little Rock and relocating to Boston. He has a surgery there TOMORROW. But, his final move will be in a month. It is a HUGE loss for Arkansas, and we were very saddened to hear that. He stressed to us the importance of the continual follow-ups of the progression either with him or another one of his LR Associates. We will very likely be traveling to Boston yearly due to the involvement of the head injury issues. Otherwise, we may have considered follow-ups in LR until (IF) surgery is needed and then transfer to Boston. But, for now we feel most comfortable staying with Dr. A.

And, a very sincere thank you to everyone for their texts today! It was amazing. It was another reminder to me, myself and I to call our church prayer pagers as often as I think about it. It was such a HUGE uplift to us all the way there and all the way back. They didn't all hit at once, but every few miles we would receive another one. It meant the world! Scott teared up several times as I would read them as they came in. So a big, big thanks!

I am very, very happy that I've made it home in time for the 188th although the landing time has changed throughout the day. I'm going to jump in the shower and head up shortly with camera (and, kleenex) in hand.

{MD consult}

Dearest Dr. Jen:

I looked at the MRI - I'm pretty sure I didn't see a tumor. Not sure what I saw, but I diagnosed several things. Very unclear about that gap between the brain and the skull - know why it's there, but thinking it's way too big. Looks like some things are missing. Some things are there that shouldn't be. I'm not sure if I was even looking at them right side up.

Okay, seriously girl............how do you read those stinkin' things?? I was giving you accolades in my kitchen 15 minutes ago. I sang your praises loudly. I am certain you heard them in Texas!!

Okay, I'm off to bed - only a few hours to sleep....

{prayer request}

If you guys could remember Scott tomorrow as we see the neurosurgeon in Little Rock with MRI scans in hand for the big check up. I haven't even looked at them this time as I just hate seeing it. Not that I could tell anything anyway other than see "it" as it glows. Can't miss it.

I am praying we get great news....remember: like it vanished! But, hoping for good news and the fact we can get out of the hospital quickly in time for me to get back to FS to photograph my cousin coming home with the 188th. It would really mean alot to all of us, so I am so hoping I can make it.

{about to cry!}

I am absolutely devastated as I am terrified Scott has the flu. Against all odds, I am praying so hard for something else, something very short-lived. It broke my heart to have to make a call to postpone a newborn session I had for tomorrow. I really do want to cry about that alone as it has been the highlight of my week and was soooo looking forward to it.

It should not be surprising me though.

Today, I got a funny message from a friend/client. I guess she was a client, but is now a friend? Anyway, met her through the photography. But, she was concerned because she had called me last week and I had referred the call to Angela - well, something happened and she never heard from either of us. She tends to get VERY paranoid. So, today, in her VERY bubbly voice, she wanted to know what she had done to make me mad, she was "fretting" she said, and she was actually hoping she had made me mad because she was not even going to think something "bad" had happened. Because you know me, I never have those dark clouds looming! ;)

I immediately phoned her back and filled her in on the events of the last two weeks with Noah. Near the end of the conversation she sweetly said, "shannon, I just don't understand all this stuff. I mean, we had the flu- but it was over in like three days. You know, you remind me of that guy in the Bible, you know the one that all those bad things kept happening to.........gee, what was his name? John the Baptist?"

My reply, well, yes a very bad thing did happen to him, he had his head cut off and served on platter, but, I don't think he's the one your talking about.

She goes on......."oh, yeah it's not him, it's that other guy....what is his name? Peter???!! That's it, Peter!"

My reply, "well, I don't think he's the one either, but, he was crucified with his head down.

She was so exsaperated at this point, I'm not sure she even heard me say Job.

I will THANKFULLY never compare myself to any of them. Rough days, yes. Being a marytr, being murdered and having to suffer beyond words. No comparison, thank God.

At the time it was pretty funny. That was until I knew I had to make the call to the sweet mama I had so looked forward to seeing tomorrow. And, now I'm just sitting here in a stupor trying to even grasp that we may possibly not be past the flu at this point.

{my kitchen blew up}

well, it didn't actually, but that reallllly could have been a title today. A few months ago, I bought a bread machine. I know, that is probably considered 'cheating'. But, that was the route I planned to take. So, this morning, I got up early as I HAD a very full day planned (I'll explain that one later) and attacked the house and decided to make my first "home"made bread via way of this machine.

I had no idea just how precise these measurements have to be. My nifty little instruction manual keep repeating that over and over and over. You would have THOUGHT I would have gotten the hint. Nada. Let's just say that I was in there measuring and pouring and reading and I did have the thought that it seemed like an awfully huge amount of yeast to be adding. So, after this machine starts working its kneading magic and I resume my cleaning duties, bam, it hit me. In just a few very short minutes and two rooms over it smelled like I was in a brewery. Or, at least I imagine that is what one would smell like? Okay, so I had at least tripled the amount of yeast I added in comparison to what the EXACT measurements of the recipe stated. So, that smelly ball of dough has been thrown away. I can't even attempt to make a second batch as I used allllll of the yeast I had. Imagine that. ugh!

And, the reason all of my plans have been derailed for today is that....not only is Evan not 100% yet (poor baby).......but, Scott has a stomach bug. I am not believing this!!!! So, all plans and appointments have been cancelled today. This is getting eerily repetitive.

{five years ago today}

i got the call that scott had been in an accident. little did we know and.....that's probably a good thing. i'm just so thankful that it wasn't any worse that it was. not a happy anniversary, but one i can find gratefulness in.