{the heart}

i was working just now and heard an ugly exchange a room away.

having grandma pat here since their earliest days has been a huge blessing to them as well as to me. i heard evan take that for granted a few minutes ago in the way in which he responded to a question gma pat had asked him.

i called him to my office and he knew. he walked in with sad eyes and slouched shoulders. i knoooooooooowwwwwwwww he said, before i even opened my mouth. "you know what?"

he thought for a moment.

could he possibly get away with it? was i calling him in for another reason? hmmm........

"you know what?"

"what?"

"evan, you know what?"

big sigh. "you know. i know. her." and he simply pointed back to the living room.

"what are you talking about evan?" again, he entertained the thought that MAYBE, just MAYBE I didn't know. I had not heard the exchange...of minutes before his voice demanding, not asking for Gma Pat to be at his beckon call. Ugliness.

He finally succumbed and confessed and promptly went to apologize.

The apology fell very, very flat. It was an "I'm sorry Grandma Pat".

I don't think she was in the room??

I immediately called him back to me. "Evan?"

"What????? I said I was sorry."

"To who?"

"to her, and again he pointed".

I reminded him how to give a heartfelt apology and the reason behind it. He promptly complied and delivered it in the right manner this time. And, of course, she had not a clue what he was even apologizing for.

But, not so fast.

Then, I saw the light.

Ugh. Sometimes I hate that. Black eyes, served-up double.

How many times do I casually offer an "I'm sorry" to Scott, the boys, my mom, a friend....or most importantly, to God. How many times, did I think they may not have noticed my shortness, or ungratefulness, or lack of sincere apology. I thought I had slid by or worst yet, just simply didn't offer it. And, the worst possible situation, giving it hastily in just words.

Point taken. I'm sorry.